Hi Mommies! I have missed speaking with so many of you!! During my time away I went on an fast that ended up allowing me to tap more into myself spiritually, mentally, and physically. Our mission is for mothers to be able to flourish in motherhood but also tap into their feminity. Creating such a powerful mission but was also losing it at the same time didn't match so I decided to detach myself the last two months.
Reflecting back from when I knew I was pregnant until now as been very bittersweet but also humbling because I honestly did not know what I was going to do. My "I'm pregnant" announcement was not ideal and I was not in the best position at the time. When I wrapped my head around what was happening, I went into survival mode. For the past three years I have literally just been surviving and not living, even when I thought I was. That all stopped March 29, 2022. I chose ME and realizing choosing ME, didn't mean I still couldn't be a great mother, fiancee, daughter, or friend. It just meant that I was going to love on myself more than I had been. I took leave my job because I was extremely stressed, emotional, binge eating and was beginning to get angry only because I was trying to stay with the company and was getting denial after denial. My last denial its like I heard God said "you going to have to leave." I didn't want too, I was comfortable, I knew how the job worked, I had great benefits, I thought if I wanted to buy a home I needed to stay, but none of that was true.
When I decided to do things the way God wanted me to I started focusing on me. I would go for walks everyday just appreciating life itself and speaking affirmations. This simple gesture began helping my anxiety in a tremendous way. I was up doing something, I wasn't thinking about what was not happening or what I needed to do. I got back into a self care routine and getting my home organized. I journaled and prayed often. I spent a lot of time ALONE and LOVED it. I soon realized it was needed for my mental. To give myself grace, take a moment and be grateful with what I have in front of me, and its ok if things are not perfect. This biggest takeaway from this time away was God has never left me. People will but not God. Trust the process and listen to what is being said to you because what God have for us will always trump what we wanted! If you are a mother and just feel like you've lost yourself, not feeling like yourself, or just overwhelmed with life these days, let me tell you, it will get better! Sounds so cliche and I understand can't just get a "break" but attempt to do something for yourself today! As much as we make the whole household comfortable and content, let's do the same for ourselves.